So summers out and this year my hair had a huge wake up call! Last summer I so wasn’t CG! straightening x3 a day (no heat protective, clip-in extensions I slept on, brushing etc… My hair naturally is incredibly coarse holds little and no moisture so my hair was a mess, however that changed in Feb of this year…
Iv always been subject to bullying in school (kids are cruel) what is deemed as “different” is a cause for victimization i.e “socially-acceptable” and that’s when I tried to fit in and if that was abusing my hair then that’s what I did, I still hear the torments now as I’m seeing my natural hair come through

Ok so the bullying happened yesterday! I washed my hair and styled and let it do its own thing wild and free, i felt i looked dam good too looking in the mirror! I was in the spar and a few elders came to me and was complimenting me on my curls and natural volume of my hair (feel-good factor) However as Im waiting in the que a few mid 20’s early 30’s women in a group (cats play nasty together don’t they?) started making snide gestures and not at all refined either… “Every heard of GHD’s?” “Maybe she got electrocuted” “Don’t be nasty, she cant help having bad hair” *cackling away* My throat felt tight, these women weren’t young girls, and what did i do to deserve it! There was a time I would of scraped my hair back that instance and be ashamed (I hardly ever, ever stand up for myself ever!) however something clicked… I shook out my hair, turned round and said

“Your cruel words aren’t representing me, they representing yourselves, it’s took me 20 years to accept who I am and my hair, if you accepted yourselves you wouldn’t feel the need to be bullies, maybe you can’t accept yourselves cos what you are is nasty and I pity you all”

I felt relieved and humble at the same time if very nervous, a young lad (kinda chavy) at the checkout said to me “I think your hair is awesome and good on ya love, least your not fake” (feel-good factor)
So two feel good factors and one bad factor in a space of ten minutes! And for once I felt so bloody proud and stronger than ever! 

I guess high-school still carries on even with adults older than me, but i think this needed to happen for me to love my hair and be proud, bring on today another natural hair down day!

I am so proud of you x

Good for you! x

Proud of you too!

(and sheesh, don’t people’s parents teach them to be nice to everyone anymore??!)

Gosh how RUDE!
Well done on putting them in their places!!

Hi Amanda-jane,

You should be proud of yourself. I’m glad you had the guts to speak up for yourself.
I really think those women were just plain jealous of your hair. Some people have to mock what is “unsual” to them. Also, the fact that 2 people complimented you in the same place, just proves the others were jealous.
i cant see your hair properly in your pic but i am certain its beautiful. who wouldn’t want full, thick curly hair????
Continue to keep your head up and enjoy being yourself.

amanda-jane - 28 May 2012 08:04 AM

So summers out and this year my hair had a huge wake up call! Last summer I so wasn’t CG! straightening x3 a day (no heat protective, clip-in extensions I slept on, brushing etc… My hair naturally is incredibly coarse holds little and no moisture so my hair was a mess, however that changed in Feb of this year…
Iv always been subject to bullying in school (kids are cruel) what is deemed as “different” is a cause for victimization i.e “socially-acceptable” and that’s when I tried to fit in and if that was abusing my hair then that’s what I did, I still hear the torments now as I’m seeing my natural hair come through

Ok so the bullying happened yesterday! I washed my hair and styled and let it do its own thing wild and free, i felt i looked dam good too looking in the mirror! I was in the spar and a few elders came to me and was complimenting me on my curls and natural volume of my hair (feel-good factor) However as Im waiting in the que a few mid 20’s early 30’s women in a group (cats play nasty together don’t they?) started making snide gestures and not at all refined either… “Every heard of GHD’s?” “Maybe she got electrocuted” “Don’t be nasty, she cant help having bad hair” *cackling away* My throat felt tight, these women weren’t young girls, and what did i do to deserve it! There was a time I would of scraped my hair back that instance and be ashamed (I hardly ever, ever stand up for myself ever!) however something clicked… I shook out my hair, turned round and said

“Your cruel words aren’t representing me, they representing yourselves, it’s took me 20 years to accept who I am and my hair, if you accepted yourselves you wouldn’t feel the need to be bullies, maybe you can’t accept yourselves cos what you are is nasty and I pity you all”

I felt relieved and humble at the same time if very nervous, a young lad (kinda chavy) at the checkout said to me “I think your hair is awesome and good on ya love, least your not fake” (feel-good factor)
So two feel good factors and one bad factor in a space of ten minutes! And for once I felt so bloody proud and stronger than ever! 

I guess high-school still carries on even with adults older than me, but i think this needed to happen for me to love my hair and be proud, bring on today another natural hair down day!

You should be soooooo proud of yourself. I hope those people were ashamed- They should be.

The best way of dealing with any bully is to stand up to them. It is hard, but now you have done it once you will be able to do it again.

Well done.

Thanks ladies!

I was incredibly scared, not going to lie, confrontation is my worst ever nightmare I normally stew and get mad as its playing on my mind (thinking what i could of done and said) but something did just click. Maybe the sheer fact that these were grown women and not silly little girls, without sounding rude they were no angelina jolie’s so insecurity on their part riddled with jealousy seemed fair obvious.. Im happy I did say what i did and the fact it came out all right not mumbled jumble! I felt 100 times stronger walking out of that spar
The first ever time i have stuck up for my hair, and not detested it from peoples nasty words!

xxx

You did good girl - wouldn’t we all love to be calm and coherent in the face of others’ silliness.  I had a comment a couple of weeks ago “lost your GHD’s?” but I couldn’t care less.  We are Curly Divas and I don’t think we should give these people any more headspace.  x

HaleBopp - 13 June 2012 10:50 AM

WoW!!  What I would give for a) an ounce of your courage and b) the bloomin’ quick wit at which to come back with!  Well done you

+1 and to all of the other comments above, I salute you for standing up for your beautiful curls! Reading your story has made my day!

Good on you girl !

People can just be mean. I think alot of curlies probably got bullied at school because of their hair. I know I did !......eeek I even remember them throwing sucked polo mints at me so they got stuck in the curls.  Looking back they were probably just jealous or intimated by someone who was willing to be their own person. And if they don’t appreciate your look then who cares. I bet, their’s probably wasn’t to your taste either, only you had the manners not to point it out

And Amanda Jane- I think your hair looks gorgeous.

WELL DONE Amanda-Jane!!!!!!

x

I wish there was a like button for that story!  Very well done!

Morning Divas!  You know what -I’m going to start a thread called “your hair looks gorgeous today” so that we can all bask in the glory that is curly and wavy hair.  See you there x